Bathroom guide: Flush with pride
by Aaron Chatha & Mayan Freeborn
Photo by Josh Naud. This toilet, located across from Herb ‘n Market, has long baffled students, faculty and staff. We, too, continue to wonder why it is disintegrating, whether someone has chewed on it at some point, and why neither it, nor the toilet seats like it, have been replaced.
As students, we’re always asking ourselves the big questions: What classes should I take? What will I do once I graduate? What’s really in that donair meat? Yuck, why does this washroom smell like death? Yep, we’ve all been there. It’s an awful thing when you gotta go, but don’t know the best place to go.
There are a lot of washrooms in Mount Royal University, and while some of them are top notch, first class “it’s so clean, am I even allowed to go in there?” washrooms, there are others that should be avoided like the plague. The Reflector is here to help. One brave man and one courageous woman dared to enter every washroom in the school, to let you know the best and the worst, and put them into a handy dandy list for you, available online in its entirety.
We ranked the washrooms by building, or wing inside the main building, because washrooms in one given area are usually cleaned at the same rate and get the same amount of foot traffic. We looked for cleanliness, smell, amount of toilet paper and overall appearance. Then we gave them a score out of 10.
Never make the mistake of entering a horrible washroom again — in the most devastating of circumstances, keep this guide by your side.
Women’s Best – Second Floor Wyckham
I gave the upstairs Wyckham House washrooms a 10 because the overall ap- pearance was pleasing. Yes, the shades of purple on the walls and matching purple tiles do add character, the large mirrors, the roomy space between the counter, toilets and hand paper towel machine sparked some excitement.
If I wanted to, I could fling open the stall door and not hit someone. Not that
I would violently throw the door open, but it was a very quiet restroom.
I will admit I am attracted to shiny objects and some peace and quiet when nature calls if I’m not in a rush. And hey, let’s face it, I want to fix my makeup after I wash my hands. The downfall — it’s a ways away from the action unless you’re working for SAMRU or studying up there.
Women’s Worst – First Floor Wyckham
It’s a different story downstairs. Wyckham House is one of the most pop- ulated areas of the school, not just by students and those in the Liberty Lounge but also by visitors, staff and instructors grabbing lunch and the high school students who wander over. The washroom is unpleasant. Although it is large and can accommodate many people at once, that doesn’t make up for the toilet pa- per, standing water and occasional tam- pon on the floor. The water all over the
counters, and the lack of toilet paper on a busy day and the smell may turn others away.
In my experience in four years at Mount Royal University, I have not seen many women wanting to touch the door on their way out. As turned off as I was and still am, not to mention the lack of tranquility, beauty and quiet, I understand why the washroom has made such a low ranking on my scale: it’s a terribly busy washroom.
Men’s Best – EC Building
EC may be across the street, but the toi- lets and urinals might as well be made of gold. It’s virtually private; not many peo- ple are ever in these washrooms. Because of that, the whole place is clean. The toi- let seats are white, all the faucets work and the mirrors are clean, so you can admire yourself as you should be admired — not with soap stains marring your per
fect complexion. And there are two types of flushing! A soft flush and a strong flush — such luxuries I would never expect to see in school. So you can go to one of the other washrooms, they’re nice enough for a student.
Or you can make the trek across the street to the EC building and feel like a king.
Men’s Worst – First Floor Wyckham
It makes sense that this washroom makes the lowest spot on the list. It gets an insane amount of foot traffic — usu- ally right after someone has eaten and their lunch isn’t sitting quite right. It’s also the first refuge for the late night drinking crowd. I’m sure a late night visit to these toilets has on occasion left the floor barely visible under layers of puke.
Even during the day, sitting or standing in there, under the drone of the fans
and yellow light, wondering how old that stench is and what its origin could be, admiring the scratches in the mirror or on the walls — all the while trying to hurry up, because that door is flinging wide open all the time and half the food court can peer inside.
It’s like staring into the maw of evil and despair — you may survive the ordeal, but not without giving up a piece of your soul.
