Sex Column: A little tongue-in-cheek

Canadians wait eagerly for the end of February every year to get their hands on a cup of Tim Hortons’ coffee for the infamous Roll Up the Rim (myself included). It’s a treasured time in Canadians.

So I figure this is the perfect time to talk about a treasured sex topic of my own: rimming!

What is rimming you ask? Well essentially, it’s the action (it can turn into an art sometimes, let me tell you!) of licking another person’s anus. Another way to think about it’s a blowjob for the booty. There are a bunch of nerve endings down there, just like the head of a penis or in the clitoris, so stimulating it orally can be ridiculously pleasurable.

Become an anilingus expert with a few tips. Any questions you may have had will disappear. Photo: Cameron Perrier

You might be thinking that putting your mouth down there is more gross than pleasurable (and kinky!). The biggest worries with rimming, like anything that deals with the back door, … little surprises. Like anal, the best thing to do is make sure the area is clean and fresh.

The easiest way to make sure you’re good is to take a seat on the porcelain throne, then take a nice hot shower and clean up with some soap. For good measure use a baby wipe for the finishing touch.

It’s also important to do a little touch up with the razor before getting started. I mean c’mon, your partner is going to rim you, not to floss. A clear play space also makes it easier to clean (which comes next).

Protection is always available! For rimming, use a dental dam, which is a small square of latex ,or non-latex, you place in front of your partner’s anus before going at it.

Now when you actually get down — there are a few ways you can give a good rim job. Flick your tongue, do the alphabet, even tongue your name into your partner’s hole. Grab your partner’s hips, hike that ass close and feast away. Spank them a little, if you ask of course — consent is sexy and squeeze those cheeks.

As a receiver, you can do more than just starfish while your partner eats away. Grind into their face, moan (if you aren’t already), even get up and sit on the giver’s face. Grind those hips! What’s really hot is to reach around and grab your partner’s head to push them in harder. Show em’ you want it. If you’re adept enough, I’m going to assume you are even tightening and loosening your anal muscles can add some interesting sensations to the act.

Now some of you might be thinking, “If I rim someone, does it mean I’m gay?” or “ewww, rimming is just for gay guys!” Yes, I will admit, rimming has been made out as something that only gay men do, but really anyone, guys and girls alike can partake in it and find it pleasurable.

My rule for any sexual act is it’s only gay if you’re doing it with someone of the same sex. So boys, if your girlfriend licks your ass, or you take an adventure to your lady’s back door, just focus on the sensation, not the per-conceived cultural notions surrounding it. You might be surprised and actually like it!

But all in all, the foray into rimming isn’t for everyone. Anyone can find it pleasurable and conversely anyone is not able to get past the idea of having a tongue down there.

What is most important is that you talk to your partner about it beforehand, take the steps to prepare and relax. Speaking from personal experience, it’s the best kind of foreplay.

Just take a page from my book: I’m a try-sexual: I’ll try anything once.